A Drink From Heaven

So here we are. October. My 21^st birthday is tomorrow, and I have plans. But you know what they are? Sleep. I have to work until 8 AM tomorrow then I get to sleep. By the time I wake up, my birthday will be almost gone. But as I don’t drink much, it’s kind of just another birthday. I mean yes, I can now buy the alcohol that I drink maybe twice a year, but it’s just another reminder that the signature on my arm will not be on another card. I remember my 19^th birthday like it was yesterday. My mom and Jim had taken me out to Red Robin for dinner. I had a bacon burger, and my mom had clam chowder. I don’t remember what Adam and Jim had, but it probably wasn’t that good for them. Anyways, I remember getting this ridiculous card that had wiener dogs on it that stretched out into a conga line and played the music. I had shown that card to my mom a week before in Bi-Mart when we went to get her pills. Two weeks after my birthday, she couldn’t drive her truck anymore. 2 months later and she was gone.

My mom always had this one thing she would say to me when I got discouraged, or couldn’t make up my mind. She would always say “as long as you’re happy, I don’t care”. She was annoyingly right about most things in my life, and my career is one them. After Mema got out of St. Luke’s, my mom practically lived with her. I would sometimes go with her on weekends, and it was there that my mom said what I should do with my life. She had seen how I always took care of people, even if they didn’t deserve it. And after having me boss her around and take care of her, she told me that I should get paid to do what I was good at. I didn’t want to admit that she was right. What teen does? But, as usual, she was 100% right.

Tonight, I am at work typing this. I have been with someone that can’t take care of themselves and they know it. I’ve watched them cry, and laugh, and say that I am a part of their family now because I walked through their door. And it is the same for every person I take care of. They see me as family because often I am there when their family isn’t. The reason I told you that is because that’s what I think about every time I come into work. There are days when I am dead on my feet and want nothing more than to lay on my floor and pass out. But I still come to work because they need me.

My last time seeing my mom before she went into the hospital was something I won’t forget. Adam and I went to McDonald's and brought her chicken nuggets with every single sauce (thanks to my friend Jackson), and I walked in and she had spilled a can of Pepsi on the floor but she couldn’t get up to clean it. So, I gave her food, cleaned up the soda, and got her a new one. I knew that she was so embarrassed that she couldn’t clean it up, but I made a joke about how Duchess could’ve cleaned it up but was too lazy.

I took care of my mom and brought her dinner 3 or 4 times a week, left classes to go grocery shopping (no wonder I failed math…), and did what I could to make her comfortable. I did it because she was my Mom. Now, I do my job because I remember that look on her face when I walked in and saw that Pepsi on the floor. I am reminded by the ink on my arm everyday why I do what I do.

So on my 21^st birthday, I will have a drink with whatever alcohol we have in the house, and I will have a second one for my Mom in Heaven.