Teal Wings

Today I had a discussion with a friend of mine about something that I realized some people don’t know about me. In the video I did, I don’t believe I mentioned something that is a big part of me and my husband. In May, we helped with the Drama production and I was sitting in the cafeteria about to throw up because the smell of Adam’s salad was making me sick. For that entire week, all I could eat was saltine crackers, and drink water or peach tea. Come to find out, it was morning sickness. The night the play opened though, I got a slap in the face from Mother Nature. I figured it was just a stomach bug that I had, but I was concerned about how painful and, to be honest, disgusting my period was. I went to the doctor and we discussed it, and came to the conclusion that it was probably an early miscarriage. Adam and I walked out of that doctor’s appointment, and by the time I got to the car, I was numb. A week earlier we were sitting on stage talking to our friends about how we we

So here we are. October. My 21 st birthday is tomorrow, and I have plans. But you know what they are? Sleep. I have to work until 8 AM tomorrow then I get to sleep. By the time I wake up, my birthday will be almost gone. But as I don’t drink much, it’s kind of just another birthday. I mean yes, I can now buy the alcohol that I drink maybe twice a year, but it’s just another reminder that the signature on my arm will not be on another card. I remember my 19 th birthday like it was yesterday. My mom and Jim had taken me out to Red Robin for dinner. I had a bacon burger, and my mom had clam chowder. I don’t remember what Adam and Jim had, but it probably wasn’t that good for them. Anyways, I remember getting this ridiculous card that had wiener dogs on it that stretched out into a conga line and played the music. I had shown that card to my mom a week before in Bi-Mart when we went to get her pills. Two weeks after my birthday, she couldn’t drive her truck anymore. 2 months later

So it has begun. September. Changing of the seasons, the coming of winter. I honestly can't say that I'm going to miss Summer. I mean what's not to love with hot temperatures, exceedingly painful migraines, and no rain? I'm looking forward to the next 6 months because they are truly the most beneficial to me. September-November bring a lot of celebrations, and then December-February bring a lot of memories to sift through and cherish.  This month is a very important month to me. September 1st marks the start of Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month. This month is so vital to the Ovarian Cancer community because it raises awareness for a disease that doesn't really get noticed that much because of its sister Breast Cancer. So lets change that! On average, the 10- year rate of someone with Breast Cancer is 83%, and the 15- year rate is 78%. If the cancer is located only in the breast , the 5 - year relative survival rate of people with breast cancer is 99%. Sixty-

So it’s 12:30 A.M. while I am typing this out. I have my Pandora Radio on playing Lady Antebellum and I’m just trying to think of a way to word what I want to say. Sometimes I have a hard time with things. Hard to believe right? A human having a hard time? Never! But some things are harder for me to handle than other things. Its hard for me to watch someone I love kill themselves slowly. And I guess now that I finally got to my point, I should explain.  About two weeks ago, I found out that someone that I love is drinking themselves into an early grave. And I made the decision to cut them out of my life from that point. It wasn’t because I was mad, because I truly was, it was because I didn’t want to watch them die. You see, the last time that they drank, they ended up in the hospital and didn’t know if they were ever coming home. We didn’t know if they were either. And then I find out that they are drinking again? Seriously? I’ll admit, I was supremely pissed. But at the same t