On My Wedding Day
 

" You're scary calm" was a common sentence that was said to me when I married the love of my life on November 26, 2015. When in complete honesty, it wasn't because I was calm, I was thinking about someone very important who was missing.  When I imagined getting ready for my wedding day, I pictured my mom helping me put my dress on, and doing my hair. I never thought that she wouldn't be there to do it. I also had pictured her giving me away. In October of 2014 when I had told her I was engaged, I had mentioned how she needed to be around so that she could walk me down the aisle. I remember her laughing about how funny it would be with her walker and her shuffling.... it would be a long walk for us. On my wedding day, it was a very emotional day. here I was, marrying my best friend, in front of those we love most, and the one person I looked up to the most was missing. I couldn't help but wonder if she would have been proud. Anyways, after the wedding, I started thinking about what else she would be missing. She would be missing the birth of Adelynn, her first grandchild, and the birth of many more after that. She would miss many more weddings and holidays and birthdays that she otherwise would have been here to see had she not passed away. Then, today, I realized something. She isn't missing them.I believe she is still seeing them. And she was there on my wedding, and for Addy's birth. Many believe that they have a guardian angel somewhere up in heaven.

I am blessed enough to call mine Mom.